Throughout your life, there will be times when you know you need to speak up and share something that may be hard for another person to hear. Whether it’s how you’re feeling, a truth about them, or a piece of information that may change your relationship with them or yourself (or both), you need to get it out.
These situations may scare you, understandably so, but they are crucial in the process of becoming who you are meant to be. They are necessary as you continue to grow.
Today, I’d like to share 5 steps you can take when moments like this arrive in your life…
1. Write it Out.
Until you get everything out on paper for you and you only, it may be hard to sort through your thoughts. I suggest getting out a notebook (maybe even your bullet journal) and free-writing about anything and everything you want to get out for 5-10 minutes. Set a timer and dump everything you’re thinking, feeling, and wanting to say onto the pages.
Once you’ve done that, start picking out the points you want to make to the person or people you’re talking to. You don’t have to have a script written out, but organizing your thoughts and making sure you touch on all of the important points you want to make will ensure that you walk away from the conversation knowing that you said what you needed to say.
2. Say it Out Loud.
Getting everything out on paper is one thing, but actually saying it out loud is another. Try to practice what you want to say out loud before you have this big conversation—either to yourself or with someone who you deeply trust outside of the situation.
You’ll likely find you have to refine or think through certain things a bit more after this exercise, which is perfectly fine. You’ll be even more prepared because of it.
3. Picture the Outcome
We’re getting closer to the point where we’re going to speak up. If you start to get nervous (and it’s highly likely and normal if you do), picture how much better you will feel when your truth is out there. Envision how proud you are of yourself. Think about the weight that will be lifted from your shoulders. Picture your relationships changing and improving, with yourself and anyone else involved. These images will inspire you to take action.
4. Speak Up
Now is the time to say what you need to say. Be brave, be honest, and before you start talking, take a deep breath. Remind yourself that everything will be OK. You’ve got this.
5. Keep Speaking Up
After an important discussion like this, you’ll likely notice how great it feels to get what you’ve been keeping inside out of your body—and you’ll likely feel motivated to feel that again. Much like any habit or muscle, the more you practice, the easier the work becomes. So, once you have your first big conversation, start to have more (when they’re necessary of course). And, remember how you feel in this moment so you can use it as inspiration when you need it again.
So, follow these steps and start speaking up, even if it scares you—especially if it scares you.
You’ll be proud you did and inspired to stand up for yourself again and again. Remember, you deserve to speak your truth and have it be heard.